Thinking in writing

Mmmmmmm, cupcake. Yummy.Candice :  In the midst of our deep and meaningful conversation in the pub a few days ago, we came across a stumbling block that we have encountered in our previous writing missions.  How to explain that a character is thinking in what you are writing.

Example 1: No one is going to be doing anything ghostly tonight, she thought, putting her face in her hands

Example 2: …it didn’t seem any different from any other tour, why had he picked it over the multitude of others?

Now in writing the Book, we decided that we would go with the option of putting , ‘character thought’, by these sections.  I have continued that, as you can see, above.  However, in this short story’s case particularly, the character is thinking alot, which kind of drowns the prose with ‘she thought’. So what to do?  One story Phil sent me the character it thinking all the way through so there is no specific reference to this,but with ours it’s told from her point of view but with conversations with other characters and descriptive scenes.

So, what do you do to prevent over ‘thoughting’ the prose but to explain that some of it is going on in their head?

Can I just point out, we’ve both got an ‘O’ Level in English Language, but that was a lonnnnnngggggg time ago!

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1 Comment

Filed under Candice, Writing

One response to “Thinking in writing

  1. I really don’t think you should put ‘he thought’ or anything like that. There’s no need for quote marks either. I think example 2 is the more professional. I was trying to think of a reword for example 1, but it’s hard out of context!

    I think this page puts it well:
    http://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1465292-How-to-write-Thoughts-of-a-Character

    Good luck!

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